q&a

Tonight, my band and I read through John 11 together. This is the part in Jesus’ story when His friend Lazarus got very sick and was expected to die soon. Instead of rushing to the scene to help and heal, Jesus waited two more days.

His justification for waiting so long? “This sickness will not end in death,” He said.

But alas, Lazarus did die*. And Jesus waited until after Lazarus passed to even think of traveling to his town. When He got there, He found Lazarus’ two sisters, Mary and Martha, grieving over their immense loss.

When she saw Him, Mary fell on her knees in reverence, realizing that Jesus was still the Sovereign Son of God. And then she said the only words she could find to say – words that, I think, came from a blend of faith, grief, and anger. “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

Her faith was displayed by her acknowledgement that He indeed could have saved Lazarus from death. Her confusion and/or anger, in my opinion, was revealed by one word: “If...” I wonder if that “if” was really screaming another question – “If You could have saved him, why didn’t You?”

When I imagine this scenario, I can almost hear a faintly accusing tone in Mary’s voice, and suddenly I know the pain she is feeling.

Questioning God usually comes out of great pain, doesn’t it?

Face it – we all have moments in our lives when we question God. I don’t chalk it up to spiritual immaturity, either. I’ve been walking with God for 18 years, but if I said I never questioned Him or got angry when I didn’t understand His ways, I’d be lying. I imagine you would be, too.

And at a certain point in your spiritual walk, the question changes. In the early days of our faith, the question we may ask God is, “Are You powerful?” But at a certain point, after we establish in our hearts that He really can do what He says He can do, and yet He doesn’t do it, the scarier question becomes, “Are You good?”

The thing is, God is not threatened by our questions or by our anger. He also is not fooled or unaware of what we’re thinking. So why don’t we just be open about it?

If you’re afraid of God’s response to your questions, be sure to look at Jesus’ response to Mary’s words. He did not chastise her. He did not rebuke her.

He watched her weep, and He was “deeply moved in spirit and troubled.” Shortly thereafter, He wept too.

The Son of God wept. He had just been challenged, in a way, because Mary didn’t understand the bigger picture, but instead of getting angry and setting her straight, Jesus felt exactly what she felt and wept with her.

How about that for our God, huh?

Here’s what I want to say to you. If you’re mad at God, just say it – to Him. He can handle it – believe me. He can handle all your anger, disappointment, and fear. But here’s the catch – don’t stay mad. What on earth good does it do?

I think after you express your doubts, anger, questions, or whatever it is, you may experience a peace that you didn’t know was possible in your situation. At least, that’s been my experience. God treasures your honesty, too. Just don’t forget that He’s, you know, GOD – still the same God from the Old Testament, the One that created the universe and smote nations…in other words, He’s a whole lot bigger, greater, and smarter than you. Fortunately for you, though, He loves you beyond measure.

And if you’re in a season of weeping right now, doesn’t it comfort you to know that Jesus weeps with you?

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Other thoughts:
My friend Gale suggested that maybe one of the reasons Jesus waited for Lazarus to die was so that He would know the loss of a loved one, like so many of us have experienced, and so He would know how to comfort us in our sorrow…Food for thought, I guess.

*(For those of you who haven’t read this story, Jesus does actually bring Lazarus back to life and restores him to his sisters – after four days in a tomb. Sometimes God lets things die completely so that, when He brings them back to life, the only one who could possibly get the credit is Him.)